The first thing I noticed was how attractive he was. And then I realized that he wasn’t just walking by the pop-up meal we’d set up on a downtown DC sidewalk; he was wondering if he could join us.
For years now and in various iterations, friends and I have created what we call “Flash Tables" and set them up on city street corners that need a little love. Any- and everyone who walks by is invited to sit down at one of the beautifully set tables, with cloth napkins, real cutlery, flowers… and we eat together. It’s that simple.
And it’s also really powerful.
On this particular day, a sweltering one, the good-looking man decided to join the table that already had some German tourists, a couple of people experiencing homelessness, and a lady who was acting a bit erratically. I was seated next to him, and after awhile he turned and said, “I love it that you’re doing these tables. You never know what’s going on for people who walk by.”
“That’s the truth,” I said, having hosted a lot of tables at which we’d heard a lot of hard stories, “People are often hurting.”
He whispered something to the effect of, “Well I’m really talking about myself. I know I’m good looking, and I know I present with confidence, but I’m really hurting. My boyfriend and I have been having trouble but today it escalated, and he threw me out. So I’m basically homeless. I mean I won’t stay that way… I have money. But I’m walking around right now looking for somewhere to live and wondering what my life will be like. And I can’t begin to tell you what it meant to me to come upon this table today, and to be included. I needed this.”
Gut punch. Cause we never know. Don’t believe anybody’s exterior presentation.
We go through life comparing our own shaky insides with other people’s outsides (and carefully crafted demeanor), don’t we?
People aren’t usually doing as well as they pretend.
As the meal progressed, the man told me he was an artist. I asked to see pictures of his work, and he shared some.
He also admitted that he had a big opening coming up at a swanky hotel in town. People were going to be gathering to celebrate his latest creations.
And then he invited me to attend.
I gave him my contact info, and a few weeks later, I got an invitation.
My husband, a couple of friends, and I decided to go.
As we entered the room for the lavish event and I grabbed a drink, he spotted me and came over. “You came!” he said. “Of course.”
He took my purse, and handed it to my husband. He handed my cocktail to one of my friends, and he twirled me around the room, doing the Tango. We laughed as I hung on the best I could, following his expert steps.
I felt the deepest sense of gratitude for the privilege of being with this charming man on one of his best nights, when he was the toast of the town.
But the gratitude was immensely magnified by the fact that I’d been with him on one of his worst days — and he’d trusted me with his vulnerable fears and grief that day.
It made his joy all the more palpable, and it deepened the celebration immensely.
May we cry with the crying and laugh with the laughing. People need company in both.
So good! We judge on external appearances for too regularly. God judges the heart!
Great story. I can picture it all. And we all need to remember those truths you speak of🤔.